I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
