I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Randomize
