I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize