So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Randomize