Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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