She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
