This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
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Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
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