Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
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