He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
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I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
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Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.