Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found your dick twin last night
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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