Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Randomize
