I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
two words...techno handjob
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Randomize
