it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
