Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
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