There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
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