Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
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