Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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