All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I think I have vodka in my lungs
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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