I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Randomize