i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
home. puking in laundry basket.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Randomize
