Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize