Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Randomize
