I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
