Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
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