I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Michael Bay diarrhea
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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