I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize
