Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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