Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
Randomize
