Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Randomize
