it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
Randomize
