My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
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