Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
