I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
