dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
