I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Randomize
