I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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