this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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