Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
