turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
