Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
i wish my penis had a tongue
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
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