Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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