Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Randomize
