South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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