Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
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