Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
Randomize
