I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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