Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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