How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
