I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
that is very illegal...i love you.
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