I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
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