im drinking this country out of the recession.
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I licked your asshole in confidence.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize